Enjoying Life, Maybe Losing Weight…

October 11, 2010

Building Trust with Myself

Creative Commons License photo credit: David365

Last week I wrote about embarking on a short experiment in “intuitive weight loss”.

It’s been an interesting experience, I guess largely because I’m having to trust myself.

The voice of self-criticism yells loudly sometimes, but most of the time I quiet her.  I think the internal part of me that loves perfection would probably say I’m doing less than great.  But a lot of that “less than great” actually is just around two things

1) I found a new type of dark chocolate which I ate entirely too much of.  I ate much more than my usual quantity, and on more than one occaision.  I even went back and bought another bar of the stuff.

2) Exercise has been largely non-existent.  I’ve been busy, I’ve been tired, I’ve been stressed and I haven’t made it a priority and haven’t made any progress on it.  That said, I really WAS busy.  I really AM tired (slept under 6 hours each night last week).

PROGRESS, not Perfection.

[pullquote]that good choices outnumber the bad ones by at least 20 to 1[/pullquote] Since I’m not weighing in (weird!) I’m not really sure where things stand, but in the end I do know that good choices outnumber the bad ones by at least 20 to 1, and other than the exercise avoidance, I feel pretty good about how I’m doing.

That old perfection brain steps in to magnify the things I’m not doing well on instead of seeing the progress that is evident.

Not sure if PROGRESS will be enough to move the scale downwards

In the end, what makes this “intuitive weight loss” just a short-term experiment is that I’m really not sure that just “progress” is enough to move the scale downwards.  I’d love for it to be, but in my experience actually losing weight requires a huge amount of effort, and I’m not sure the laissez-faire and self-forgiving attitude will work.

Two days ago I would have sworn that I’m probably gaining a little weight, not losing, and that at best this approach might work for maintenance, but then today I put on a pair of black pants that were rather unflattering a month ago, and they fit well today.

The stress management is going well – it helps that we’ve had opera tickets for the past two weekends, I’ve had the time to do some cooking, weather is that wonderful cool and sunny autumn kind (perfect for sweaters!) and I’m taking time to enjoy the many good things in my life.

In the end, if the scale is up or down a few pounds it won’t make a difference – but I’m still hoping that at next Monday’s weigh in, it’s down a smidge…

Weight loss plan for the week :

I might be following “intuitive weight loss” for a few weeks, but I’m still sticking to my weekly goal process of reviewing & setting new goals.

Last week I had two goals, one on exercise (failed) and one on pleasures / happiness (failed).   I did plenty of other things okay, but somehow tracking even good things like daily pleasures didn’t seem to fit the “intuitive” style I was working to learn.  And I’m in major resistance to exercise right now.

Again, cutting back since last week I went from 3 to 2, and unachieved, this week it’s down to only ONE, and it’s all about the exercise.

My goal this week : 1) Exercise when and how I feel like it

And I’d like to blog about two things related to exercise.  One, the reasons I want to become a regular exerciser, and two, how I feel before, during and after exercise this week.  … but let’s just consider those writing prompts and not actual goals…

Structuring my goals to focus on the thing that is most important to my progress right now.

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